Dec 29
What I’m Thankful For
Gratitude and Covid-19 don’t usually go in the same sentence. But when my husband Steve and I recently tested positive, that is very much what I felt. Grateful we were fully vaccinated and boosted, with only cold-like symptoms. Grateful the positive result came one day before a scheduled trip to New York. And most grateful that if we had to get sick, it did not happen anywhere near our wedding last year or when we were flying regularly between NYC and Orlando.
Within about a week, we were feeling better and we’re back to our normal routine now.
“Good health – physical, mental, emotional — is everything,” my mom used to say. “With it, all things are possible. Without it, nothing else matters.”
Covid aside, this holiday season has brought sobering reminders of how true this is.
Earlier this month, my beautiful friend Rachel died of colon cancer. Just like when dear friend Molly passed away from breast cancer six years ago, I am devastated to see someone so young and vibrant taken. Molly was 45, Rachel only 38.
Truly incandescent souls, it doesn’t seem possible both of them are gone now.
My cousin says God needed Rachel to come home to be an angel, to be part of a bigger plan. An angel for sure, she made the transition of moving to Orlando from New York less lonely for me. After being introduced through a mutual friend, we clicked immediately. Though I mourn the memories we will not have, I cherish the ones we shared and will be forever grateful to have known her.
One of Rachel’s favorite things was Hallmark holiday movies. This year, for the first time and in her honor, I watched several. Spirited and fun – much like her – they injected an additional dose of festive cheer into the season. My favorites: the NYC-set Hanukkah on Rye, Eight Gifts of Hannukah and A Castle for Christmas.
I’m especially grateful that I’m beginning to feel more settled into life as a Floridian. Little by little, I am putting down roots here. Getting to know Orlando better, slowly making friends and soon, moving to a new house. Can’t think of a better way to ring in 2023.
Most of all, I remain overwhelmingly grateful for the blessings of married life with Steve and our beloved pup Benji. These two give me so much. I feel like the luckiest woman in the world to share my days with them.
Happy New Year!
Jul 30
MISSING MY TRIBE
When you work in hospitality, changing zip codes is a fairly regular occurrence. Thankfully, in the ten years that I have been part of this industry, I only had to move once for a job. My boss at the fabulous Hyatt Regency Orlando made the move here from Atlanta in January. When his family recently joined him, I asked how his two kids are adjusting.
“They love the pool and the weather,” he said candidly. “But they miss their friends.”
I know exactly how they feel.
Whether you are eight or 48, establishing relationships in a new place isn’t easy. During an ill-fated, five-month stint as an L.A. resident, I made just one friend. Thankfully, Orlando is a much more welcoming city. As one of the world’s top tourist destinations, it has plenty of friendly, genuine people — many of whom, like me, used to call New York home. Whenever I run into a former New Yorker here, there’s an instant camaraderie. A mutual appreciation for life in the Sunshine State being a nice change from the Big Apple’s hustle and bustle.
Still, it takes time to cultivate more than passing acquaintances. As that process slowly unfolds, I am missing my tribe back in NYC. And thinking about the misconceptions that happen when both your marital status and hometown change at the same time.
After I moved down to Florida in December, communication patterns with close friends began to change. At first, I chalked it up to the holiday season. And as my wise husband Steve observed, the fact that I was still visiting New York frequently, until May when I sold my apartment. I nevertheless asked two close friends about their radio silence. Both of them said they assumed I was busy settling into newlywed life and they didn’t want to intrude on that. This surprised me because nothing could be further from the truth.
As anyone who knows me will tell you, the ties that bind are and always have been a central, cherished part of my life. At a very young age, I learned from my mother that friendships deserve to be prioritized regardless of whether you’re single or partnered up. I adore my husband. But that will never change how much I love and need my friends.
To his credit, Steve often says that the value I place on friendship is one of the things he admires most about me. That’s a measure of who he is and how well he understands me. And something I never experienced until he came into my life.
My dear friend Caroline knows about the challenges of starting over in a new place. She lives in Australia now and, with her French-born husband, did a spell in Paris for a few years. During a soul-soothing video chat, I shared both my current loneliness — and optimism about the possibility of connecting outside of work with a particular colleague.
“We have a love of boy bands, soap operas and roller coasters in common,” I said.
“That’s the basis for at least a three-month relationship,” Caroline joked.
Kidding aside, it’s reassuring to catch a glimpse of new beginnings on the horizon. No doubt, my boss’s kids will experience the same when they start school. Looking forward to hearing about their play dates with new friends. And to having a few of my own.
Nov 3
NYC Gal Once Again
When you travel out of your comfort zone, it makes you see your starting point with fresh eyes. That’s what’s happened for me with my move from NYC to L.A.
A new job in the sun soaked city of palm trees, beaches (and yes, traffic) was too powerful for me to pass up. Especially since I had several acquaintances and a few friends in L.A. Having moved away from NY multiple times before, I naively assumed the transition would be equally seamless once again.
As indicated in recent blog posts, that didn’t turn out to be the case. Despite LA’s picture perfect weather, my fortysomething self had a much harder time adjusting to a new zip code than did my twentysomething counterpart. Trying to navigate a car-based city without wheels of my own (Uber notwithstanding) wasn’t easy, and neither was doing without the easy access to dear family and friends that has been a huge cornerstone of my life.
Then, there was the job I made the move for. The two colleagues whom I became most friendly with ended up resigning — as did my boss who was 80% of why I took the job in the first place. It was a perfect storm of events that made it impossible for me to feel settled in L.A. — and reinforced the fact that my heart and home are very much in NYC.
So very recently, for the second time in six months, I made a cross country move. And I am definitely looking at my hometown differently now. The things that I had grown tired of I now appreciate in a new way, having had a break from them. For example, the cranky crowds. There’s an intimacy that comes from living in such close proximity to one another that’s the opposite of LA’s sprawling nature. And I love love LOVE being able to walk or take public transportation everywhere again. Simply put, I am happy and grateful to be a New York City Gal once again.
There’s no place like home.
Aug 9
Catching Up With A Dear Friend
When you’re adjusting to life in a new city, reconnecting with family and friends makes all the difference. Welcoming loved ones makes you feel more like a local than a visitor. I was reminded of this over the weekend when my friend from college Pam visited from San Francisco.
Pam and me at Dodger Stadium
Pam and I hadn’t seen each other since our 20th Mount Holyoke reunion last year so we had plenty to catch up on. We shared a lot of laughs and conversation about life, love, career and the swift passage of time. And we did it while exploring some of LA’s iconic attractions.
Take me out to the ball game!
On Saturday, we headed over to Dodger Stadium to watch the Dodgers take on Pam’s beloved Red Sox. It was the first visit for both of us and we were impressed with the stadium’s retro design and pristine facilities. From oversized bobble head figurines to bright blue décor, Dodger Stadium harkens back to a time when venues were named for beloved teams instead of corporations. And there’s no shortage of great food options too (Mexican fare and delicious fries among them).
After the game, we drove over to Santa Monica. I was pleasantly surprised and a little impressed that I was able to navigate us better than Waze or Google Maps. Even though I’ve been more of an Uber/Lyft passenger than a driver over the last five months here, I’m definitely learning my way around! Santa Monica was packed with pedestrians and the odd street musician as we strolled around the Third Street Promenade.
We stopped for dinner at Italian bistro Trastevere—B-minus overall, Locando del Lago nearby is much better—before taking in the lively scene at Santa Monica’s historic pier and amusement park. Then it was back to my place in West Hollywood for an evening of wine, watching the Olympics and more great conversation.
No matter how much time passes, you can always pick up right where you left off with true friends. So thankful that Pam is one of them.
Jun 12
Celebrating The Firsts Of My LA Adventure
What A View: Doheny Drive palm trees during my walk home from the gym.
After joining LA Fitness’ Beverly Hills location, I worked out for the first time in a month–the longest I’ve gone without hitting the gym in about 4 years. I forgot how exhilarating it feels to exercise. And it felt even better that as always, I managed to time my workout perfectly to catch a rerun of my favorite show Castle.
Home Sweet Home: my bedroom, furnished at last
